I remember when our kids were little, and summer days felt so long. The sticky popsicle hands, muddy feet, constant snack requests, and “I’m bored” on repeat—those summers seemed endless. We’d crash into bed each night wondering how many more times we could sing Baby Shark without losing our minds.

And then—snap—those long summers became short years.

Today, our son is 17, our daughter is 14. Life looks different now. Meals together are rare treasures. Between jobs, driver’s ed, and Cross Country practice, dinner at the same table happens maybe once or twice a week, if we’re lucky. And yet, we still fight for that time, because we know now what we didn’t fully grasp then:

We only get 18 summers.

Eighteen summers to watch them chase lightning bugs.

Eighteen summers to build blanket forts and stay up too late.

Eighteen summers to really see who they’re becoming.

Alex and I talk about it often—how the little moments became the big ones. How we wish we could go back to one of those “longest summers” just for a day, to hear that belly laugh one more time or to watch them leap into the pool with fearless joy.

But we’re not here to make you feel guilty. Parenting is beautiful and so hard. Life pulls at us from every direction, and most of us are doing the best we can. So if you’re in a season where you feel like you’re not doing “enough” with your kids this summer—please take a breath. Let that pressure go.

You don’t need extravagant plans or endless hours.

You need intentionality.

You need presence.

You need grace for yourself.

Here are a few ways we’ve learned to embrace quality time in the busy teen years:

 1. Plan one thing a week.

One family dinner, one coffee run, one game night. It doesn’t have to be big—just consistent.

2. Be interruptible.

Teens open up when it’s convenient for them—often late at night, in the car, or while unloading the dishwasher. Be ready to pause and lean in when it happens.

3. Start small rituals.

We try to have “Sunday Check-ins” with each kid. It’s usually short, sometimes silly, but it keeps the heart connection alive.

4. Reflect together.

This summer, we created a tool to help families slow down and reflect:

👇🏼 [Download your free copy of the 10 Summers: A Family Reflection Journal here.]

It’s simple. It’s meaningful. And it’s a way to help you pause and capture the magic that’s still happening—even in the midst of chaos.

I won’t pretend I’ve figured this all out. There are days I miss the toddler chaos, and others I’m in awe of the young adults our kids are becoming. But every summer now feels like a countdown. And rather than dread the end, I want to savor what’s here—today, this week, this meal—whatever we can get.

Because even if we only get 18 summers, the memories we make can last for generations.

With gratitude and grace,

Becky Hyman

Phil Hyman Portraits

Greenville, South Carolina

Family | Children | Photography | Legacy